Question: “I'm too important to be screened. I'm very famous (insert unrecognizable 70’s actor's name) and/or manager at Office Depot. I want discretion!” 

 Answer: Discretion means I won't divulge your private info nor draw attention to the nature of our arrangement. Ever. It is about confidentiality. 

Those who avoid screening are either hiding their history of violence or intend to hurt ladies without fear of repercussions. If assaulted, burglarized, or worse, how far will "Donald Duck from CA" get me? 

Being discreet does not mean I entertain anonymous folks. As I've heard it posited once, "You wouldn't give the keys to your house to a complete stranger without doing a background check, would you?"

 As a very petite 5’1” lady weighing 120 lbs, I can only grant time to gentlemen, women, and couples I can trust implicitly with my life and safety. 

I do happily sign NDAs for *current* and relevant professional athletes and entertainers. Fake “ReALiTy TV” celebrities get an eyeroll.

 Q: “Send me your unblurred pics so I know you're real.” 

 A: I literally blur only two pupils to prevent facial recognition software from triangulating my features and connecting that to this stigmatized industry.

If eyeballs are deal-breakers for you but you think compromising my security is not, I guarantee we won’t be compatible.


Q: “I sent emails over and over again. You replied to the first one. Why won’t you reply to the other 4267 emails I sent?”

Answer: Genuine clients who sincerely want to meet do not waste time. Just as I don’t play games by wasting anyone’s time, I cater only to clients who don’t play power games or partake in carrot-dangling. If after one email I sense my time is being wasted by someone who didn’t read my website or “How To Book Me” page, I block that person’s email. 

Rapists, crooks, thieves, and violent men have difficulty following instructions and respecting boundaries. Refusing to read instructions is one of the fastest way to screen potentially nightmare punters from having any access to me.

Q: “How should we dispense with the pecuniary details?” 
 A: Please have the proper amount placed on the bathroom counter before I arrive so that I may count - and check for counterfeits - in private. If meeting for a Dinner Date, a gift bag or book is a stealthy way of transferring considerations in public.

Continued on FAQ Part II

Cart Details

Your Shopping Cart is empty.

Questions? Just ask!